Monthly Archives: July 2012

Test Run Episode 5: A Game Console For The 99%

OMG guys are you super psyched for the Ouya!??!!?! It’s not even here yet and it’s already changed our lives; we’ve switched over to Maximum Strength Alka Seltzer to deal with the extra heartburn all of these new fanboys are giving us.

Episode 5: A Game Console For The 99%

There is definitely no room for a second analog stick in that gaping chasm on the right.

Today we start things off by talking about the Steam Summer Sale before jumping into a random assortment of news from the past week:

3:30 “Recent Gaming News” – Opining on recent happenings in the video game world.

  • IGN is super excited that Resident Evil 6 has spider nudity.
  • Square Enix thinks that the current console generation has lasted way too long.
  • The Old Republic continues to bleed out goes free to play.
  • NEVER try to scam Chinese arcades.
  • Nintendo says that their new super-sized 3DS-XL is too small for a second analog stick.
  • How Digg lost it all.

20:30 “The Worst Thing That Ever Happened To Us (This Week)” – The Ouya isn’t the problem (but you people are).

32:20 “LET’S TALK ABOUT GAMES!” – Discussing Sins of a Solar Empire: Rebellion and the modding scene.


Feel free to discuss the podcast and give us some feedback in the comments below. If you’re interesting enough then we might even talk about you next Monday when we release a brand new episode.

Does IGN Even Have Editors Anymore?

A few weeks ago as I was preparing for the relaunch of Gamers Must Die, one IGN article in particular stuck out to me and I bookmarked that shit so that I could rant about it someday. While IGN posting a dumb editorial is hardly news, this piece in particular was appalling even by IGN’s standards.

“Why IGN Will Not be Reviewing Pocket Planes Any Time Soon” by Justin Davis

The gist of this editorial is pretty simple: one of the guys who reviews iPhone games on IGN (Justin Davis) encountered a bug in the game Pocket Planes that caused him to lose his savefile. Therefore, instead of reviewing the game Justin decided that a little righteous indignation was in order and pointed out that there was no way in hell IGN would consider reviewing Pocket Planes while issues like this existed.

One the surface he seems to have a valid point. Savefile loss is a huge issue and the ensuing frustration is understandable. Read a little further, however, and you discover that not only was the bug in question fixed well before this article was even written, but that Justin readily admits that he neglected to download the fix:

In the interest of transparency, when my own progress was lost I had not updated the game to the most recent 1.0.2 patch.

In the interest of transparency? How about in the interest of you not being a douche bag, pay attention to the patch notes for a game that you’re putting hours into and set aside 30 seconds to fucking update it. Furthermore, if a bug that afflicted an incredibly small minority of players has already been fixed, it’s no longer news. Perhaps make a footnote in your review about the issue, but don’t go and publish a scathing editorial about the game that is completely irrelevant before you even hit the submit button.

Keep in mind that Justin wrote this article not only after the bug had already been fixed, but even after the developers themselves had offered to manually restore the progress any afflicted users had lost. In the face of his issue being fixed, Justin Davis decided to throw a public tantrum declaring that there was no fucking way he’d be reviewing Pocket Planes until his issue had been fixed.

Personally, I’d refuse to review Pocket Planes because they put a “Tweet” button in the HUD.

By the way, saying that a game is so broken that you’re not going to review it is in fact reviewing it. If show-stopping bugs that afflicted a minority of players were enough to slap a game with a scarlet letter instead of giving it a proper review, IGN could probably fire three quarters of its staff. Seeing as how even both of the last Metroid and Zelda games launched with similar bugs, IGN could save themselves a lot of time and money on reviews.

Finally, while I can perhaps understand Justin having a moment of frustration, what I can’t understand is how one of the biggest gaming news sites out there actually published this trash. Any editor worth his salt would have sent this article back to Justin’s desk with a big red X drawn through it, but instead it was posted on the front page of IGN for a couple days. I think that The Wire needs a season 6 set in San Francisco focused on the gaming media; IGN headquarters would probably be a good analog for The Baltimore Sun.

Test Run Episode 4: No Endgame In Sight

Please note that today’s episode was recorded outdoors in the beautiful Pacific Northwest, and we apologize in advance to any pathetic shut-ins out there who may find the sounds of nature and outdoor ambiance disturbing.

Episode 4: No Endgame In Sight

Nintendo finally made a real controller. Woo hoo.

In this episode, after making a bunch of blanket statements about the types of people who can’t handle blanket statements, we talk about our recent hilarious encounter with the sad denizens of Something Awful. Then it’s on to the news:

10:10 “Recent Gaming News” – Opining on recent happenings in the video game world.

  • Does Diablo 3 really need an endgame?
  • Tomb Raider controversy
  • Is the Wii U a glorified Xbox 360? (spoiler alert: yes)
  • Reselling “used” copies of digital games.

29:00 “This Week In Gaming History” – The Last Starfighter. Relevant YouTube clip (see 1:15 for the part we talk about):

34:20 “What the fuck, Bro?” – A rant about the “smurfification” of the term “trolling”. See the fake Dawnguard review we describe for an example of real trolling, and also be sure to read up on why people who demand that you use the phrase “in my opinion” online are retarded.

Near the end of the podcast Jared talks about his favorite YouTuber and that kid’s new song.


Feel free to discuss the podcast and give us some feedback in the comments below. If you’re interesting enough then we might even talk about you next Monday when we release a brand new episode.